So we are back at the Palace of Varieties with far more MPs than expected – and relatively few casualties.
It was perfectly possible to foresee where undecided voters were likely to go when at last they got round to making up their minds.
Plus: Scotland is a problem of Labour’s own making. Dan Jarvis’s time has come. Prepare for a UKIP leadership bloodbath. And good riddance to Vince Cable!
In 1992, the Party won. Then it fell apart. After his own awesome comeback yesterday, Cameron will ponder the lessons of history.
Plus: The CCHQ charm school. Disgraceful Livingstone. Untruthful Clegg. Nasty Russell Brand. Where I’ll be on election night. And: Advice to candidates for the count.
Can the Tory leader pull of an election victory? Only if he stops going through the motions, which seem to have been set by someone else.
It is like a Monty Python sketch, with an Englishman manning the barricades and shouting at the Scots as they advance: “Watch out! That man is wearing a skirt.”
His task during this campaign and after is to persuade the people that the Tories stand for something better than business as usual.
He was the last custodian of a lost Tory tradition of professional party organisation which maintained the Conservatives as a national institution.
I refer, of course, to the funeral of Richard III. But some MPs, not all of them Tories, have a different committal in mind.
The aftershock of Cameron’s bombshell. Plus: Two Bobs and the slivovitz. John Hayes in a Wheelie Bin. And: Richard III – Vaz’s part in his downfall.
Conservative MPs are against panicky measures to boost their party’s poll ratings. But there is support for more projection of the Tory team as a whole.
My last ConHome column addresses the same topic as my first: If I were a Tory, here’s what I would do.
This no-holds-barred conversation will involve members, activists, digital friends, MPs, councillors and professional staff – and I want all the big questions asked.