As any sensible person knows, the Right is nasty, heartless and exploitative, while the Left is loving, compassionate and kind. This is a truth in and of itself, and should never be laid low by grubby things like policies, behaviour or facts.
Accordingly, here are two reminders of the British Left being more compassionate than you could ever hope to be, you blackhearted monsters.
Exhibit 1 is from Jack Monroe, trendy food writer for The Guardian, face of Sainsbury’s and self-appointed anti-austerity champion:
Because he uses stories about his dead son as misty-eyed rhetoric to legitimise selling our NHS to his friends: #CameronMustGo
— Jack Monroe (@MsJackMonroe) November 23, 2014
That might strike you as cruel, unpleasant or even just plain rude, but don’t forget: this is someone who opposes the Conservatives, so it’s okay. In fact, it’s laudable – when someone has already proven they are nice by being left wing, slinging poisonous abuse at Tories about the most painful experience in any parent’s life can only bolster that reputation.
Exhibit 2 is provided by Jamie Hanley, Labour candidate for Pudsey:
Sure, if a rightwinger did this it would be an outrageous example of hijacking a children’s charity mascot for party political ends. But relax – it’s all in a good cause, remember?